Hello, testing 1,2,3,… Is this thing on?

What's wrong with wearing a little dead animal on my head?

I’ll start by saying that this is my first weby-blogy thing, and I may not have a handle on all the bells and whistles yet, so forgive me if it’s not fancy… it will be soon. At the recommendation of Facebook friends who are members of my group, I decided to try blogging to escape the fb Nazi’s who like to delete my profile for no apparent reason other than I do tend to lean to the left of center. So, grab a beverage, get a snack and enjoy the world according to Scarah:

Hello there to all of my blindly following, devoutly devoted fans. And, to the few of you who have no idea who I am (because literally tens of, well, tens, already do) let me introduce myself. I’m Scarah Palin, and I’m out to spread the real word about why baggers, religious zealots, and far-right wingnuts love their fearful leader. Nothing and everything I say is true, and absolutely nothing I say is sanctified by anyone or everyone, but it’s all believable. Why? Well, let me explain.

Who would have believed that a fanatically religious (Charismatic Pentecostal), short-term hockey mom, runner-up beauty pageant contestant, Mayor of the middle of nowhere, Governor of few, champion of animal cruelty, environmental rapist, trampoline stealing woman would have been plucked out of obscurity… overlooking all the truly qualified and intelligent women in the political arena, to run for Vice President, if they hadn’t seen it with their own eyes? No one. If we hadn’t witnessed it first-hand, we would have thought she was a poorly-written character from a made-for-television movie produced by Fux. But, sadly it was true.

Who would have believed that this person (who we now know is a real person) would take her sad little bible thumping dog and pony show on the road, campaigning harder after losing than she did while she still had an office to campaign for? No one. Losers usually go home.

Who would have thought that a person who brought a Pentecostal Reverend from Kenya to cast spells to protect her from witchcraft, parades her children around like stage props (after abandoning her five-month-old special needs baby for the campaign trail), admits to knowing nothing about her pregnant teenage daughter’s sexual activity (after allowing her boyfriend to live with her family), and routinely stands in front of crowds to lie and misconstrue the actions of our President to the point of what should be considered sedition, would actually be able to build a huge following? No one with even one working brain cell, that’s who. No one.

Given all of the hard-to-swallow, fact is stranger than fiction, delusional thinking that led to her popularity with the simple minded and ill-informed, I decided that someone should be making her real motivations blatantly obvious. I know… it’s another dirty job, but someone’s gotta do it.

So, please check back regularly to find out Scarah’s take on the one who shall remain nameless and let your friends know that there is a voice of reason out there somewhere… clearly not my voice, but somewhere in the world, or perhaps even in America, there are people who realize a lie when they see one walking around in $1,000 Prada boots (didn’t the devil also wear those?); who realize that even when you truly loathe a public personality you can laugh to keep from crying; and know full-well that pageant walking and quirky winking do NOT a political leader make.

As always, blowin’ kisses and wavin’ like a pageant queen,
Much Love, Scarah Palin

┬ęScarah Palin 2010

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4 Responses to Hello, testing 1,2,3,… Is this thing on?

  1. Judi Childs Dekker says:

    You rock Scarah! I’m so excited that I get to leave the very first comment on your gonna be famous blog! Love you, love this and love what you have to say, so keep on talkin’!

  2. Joe Knab says:

    Love the idea. They can’t delete you here. We need Scarah far more than Sarah.

  3. Ann says:

    Scarah, I absolutely love your blog. You are one creative person, and convey all the thoughts I have about this woman who somehow entered our collective conscious-ness by virtue of a man named John McCain, who seemed to scour the ends of the earth before he found his ideal (rogue-ish) running mate, who exemplified what he wished to portray–that women should be slightly dense, that they should look good ina tight skirt, not have too much knowledge for fear of being “intimidating”–who could appeal to the “Average Joes” of the world (oh, those six-pack-totin’ Americans by golly) and who could wink, and smile. A flash in the pan was what most of us thought. But, somehow she eneded up becoming this charismatic figure who now has decided that becuase she can’t accept defeats graciously, she must smear our President! And, has she ever set her sights on doing that! She has become the un-official spokesperson for the Tea Party, she has bordered on being a sedition-ist, secessionist (or certainly represented them prior to her running for V.P and that being seen as “un-patriotic”). She has highlighted the fact she only accepts her own beliefs and will listen to no-one (Goin’ Rouge — haha) and she keeps appealing to the special group of people who think somehow her rhetoric makes her a Christian lady. She can be against stem cell research, though has a special needs child, she can be for the Wars, and against (abortion), she can hack into a rival’s e-mail and yet want to throw the book at a 22-yr old youth for hacking hers (which, btw was about as simple to do a 3rd-grader could’ve managed it), she has children who haven’t been the role models of good behavior, and has a very young child who needs her attention and care, yet she accepts any speaking engagement presented to her, including for a cash-strapped university, who should not be spending money on speakers (who can’t even SPEAK)!

  4. Tom says:

    Palintology? Wait, is that a religion or a study of dinosaurs?
    We love you Scarah!
    Have you thought about actually running for office? That would be wonderful… as a independent on the ballot … the illiterate tea-baggers who haven’t taken their “hooked on phonics” course would have a 50-50 chance of voting for you instead of Sarah!

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